Dr. Nikki Goldstein

FROM dating trends to tales of love, horror dates to expert tips, Sarah Swain explores single life in Sydney. BOBBLY-JUMPER MAN “YOU are what you wear,” somebody once said. But when it comes to dating, does it matter? It was something I was keen to explore after a recent lucky escape from a man who had a penchant for wearing bobbly ribbed jumpers, too short black work trousers and work shoes — even though he didn’t have a job. That wasn’t the only reason I wasn’t too keen — but it was a glaring issue and one I’m not afraid to admit (braces for trolls). Don’t get me wrong. I love clothes more than most, but I’m certainly not bothered about designer outfits — you can look stylish in Zara, H & M or even op shop with a bit of effort. Jumper man also complained, by text, I never stayed out more than a couple of…

What a journey our attitudes towards anal sex have taken over the last few years. From Drake and the butt-eating conundrum, to scientific celebrations of big booties, to pegging on Broad City, to twerking, to Kim Kardashian’s epic shiny rump on the cover of Paper Magazine, it’s no question that all things ass-related have taken on a mainstream edge. Pop-culture acolytes proclaimed 2014 the “Year of the Booty,” which heralded a deluge of think pieces about the portrayal of butt sex on mainstream television shows like The Mindy Project and articles assessing the erotic potential of the anus. It’s now ascended to a cushy place in pop culture where it’s become much less shocking to talk about and engage in the act of anal sex. Data from PornHub reveals that from 2009 to 2015, search volume for anal sex videos skyrocketed by 120 percent. But it’s not just virtual fantasies that are increasing. People are also having anal sex more regularly. A 2017…

I can’t simply explain what it means to have good sex, but I can hazard a guess as to why so many of us are getting it wrong. When it comes to what we “should” do in the bedroom, there are so many mixed messages. Porn tells us we should groan and moan and be rather aggressive, some magazines tell us we need to be having multiple orgasms, while some might want us to believe that a longer, harder erection is the key. We all have a goal when it comes to sex, but even having a goal might be distracting us from what’s going on and the pleasures we might otherwise enjoy. When touched sexually, our bodies will naturally respond, but if our minds are so busy worrying about where the bedroom experience is going, the pleasure pathways from our bodies to our minds might be so distracted that they can’t…