I don’t know if it’s a sexologist thing or just something I get hung up on, but I have become one of those people who analyse the language we use. I believe that we can change the way we and others view certain topics by changing the language we use surrounding them. When it comes to sex, there are many words that can be seen as not sex positive or even confusing. Let’s even take the word sex for example. We use it a lot, but it’s a word we can’t even define. What is sex? Is it penis in a vagina or is it fingers in a vagina or a penis in an anus? There are multiple different meanings for one word, and universally we cannot even agree on what it is. Here are a few others that I feel could be describing the act negatively or even posing…
“Hi Dr Nikki. I’m a 40-year-old man, married for 13 years. We have a kid and I found my wife is cheating on me again. I discovered her four years ago having an affair. I forgave her and we worked together to rebuild our relationship but now I’ve realized that she is doing the same thing. I don’t really want to keep going with this. Is it better to finish? I don’t love her the same.” When it comes to rebuilding a relationship after infidelity, it’s a very complex matter and I feel that as a society, we quickly demonize somebody for doing it when we want to help the other person move on. We say things like “that person disrespected you”, “they have broken your trust”. And whilst that might be true, the biggest thing with infidelity is asking why. That might start to give us insight into…
I have really struggled watching the news from Alabama banning abortion. It horrifies me not only as a woman but because only a few months ago I spoke at a function in Brisbane supporting the decriminalisation of abortion in Queensland. Now I understand that this is a sensitive topic for many, but felt that it’s probably the right time to repost my speech from that night. I ask once again in sharing this that all opinions remain respectful. If you feel the need to have a say or voice a different opinion on socials, that’s fine but please refrain from turning any comments into abuse or attacks on myself for expressing my thoughts. My Keynote on Decriminalising Abortion I wasn’t sure what exactly to say that might make a difference because after talking to people, I soon realised that my beliefs on the subject are just that, my beliefs….
My latest obsession is Bachelor in Paradise. It’s like watching real life Tinder play out with the backdrop of Fiji. But besides the drama, chaos, love triangles, squares and every other shape, it’s the representations of men that has me intrigued. Glued this week, I realised there are three main types of men represented on this show. And I’ve dated them all! The Bills, Jules and Ivans of this world. But for the poor girls in paradise, being maybe a bit younger and naïve, they might not be able to see what I see (and what I have learnt). But that doesn’t stop me from sharing it with the rest of you. (Please note, this is not meant to be disrespectful towards these men, but this is more about how to navigated the obstacles when dating them). Lets start with Bill… If you have not been watching, Bill is the…
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