I’m in a serous relationship and my partner and I want to stop using condoms. I know we should both get tested but before we got together I was quite wild and did have a few drunken times where the condom came off. I’m so scared I have something. What if my test results come up showing this?
Being in a serious relationship means things will come up that are potentially awkward. But sorting through these situations together is how you can potentially grow as a couple.
Everyone has a past and there is nothing to be ashamed of. Things happen and safer sex mistakes can happen too. There is every possibility that your partner might have experienced something like this this too.
If you are concerned about what the test will say, discuss it before. Tell your partner about your concerns without going into too much detail. We all have a past but unless they are that type of person who really wants to know for the right reasons, leave out every specific detail and stick to the brief overview – you have had unprotected sex before and anxious about the test.
You can’t change anything that might or might not appear on the test results, but you can now change the emotional consequences by having a discussion and airing your anxiety.
If this is a serious relationship and you see a future with this person, then talking about things you feel awkward about will only help you do so with other things in the future.
The idea of STI’s can be scary but being in a serious relationship means you don’t have to go through that fear alone.