Yesterday morning whilst watching Weekend Sunrise, my attention was grabbed by a segment on a book about why men fake it by Dr Abraham Morgentaler. It would come as no surprise that I am a fan of this content on TV and a big thanks to Sunrise for presenting such a great segment in an educational way. But Dr Morgentaler made some interesting points I wanted to highlight.
The question was raised, “ Can Men actually fake it and do they”. Yes! According to Dr Morgentaler’s research, men fake it to please women and try to be “good and noble” ( if only all my x boyfriends tried to be good and noble in the bedroom).
So apparently we think they want to be selfish ( experience would back that up for many women). But in actual fact Dr Morgentaler insists that men want to be sexual providers and for us not to get offended if they don’t’ experience an orgasm. Maybe it really is a case of that saying “happy wife, happy life”.
It’s not just about guys liking sex, but maybe a deeper desire to pleasure their partner. Isn’t that more pressure for women to fake it or should it be more pressure for us to communicate about our needs and fantasies in the bedroom and tell our partner what get’s us going? We have mouths, brains and the ability to communicate than why should anyone be faking it these days?
There are some circumstances which I believe the “fake” is ok, but if it’s on regular basis, I would think there is some investigation needed.
What is it to be a man these days? Have women taken their roles and made them confused about their place? Does the rise of the alpha female put more pressure on men to be a provider in the bedroom?
Personally, I wish people would not even aim to be a provider when it comes to sex but focus on the sexual connection between each other and look at pleasing themselves as much as their partner.
Dr Morgentaler’s message to women: (Besides taking it easier on men), if there is a problem in the bedroom, don’t think it is you. (Phew that’s a relief).
His other advice: men and women are more similar than we think. He maintains that we both want a close connection and want to be accepted and valued for who we are and I couldn’t agree with him more.
If you missed out on the segment this morning – make sure you check it out here