Recently I met someone who was telling me a story about a friend whose daughter recently had a baby and was then killed in a tragic car accident whilst living overseas. After this, they had a breakdown and sought help where a therapist starting asking them – but where is the gift? Have you been over to see your granddaughter? She pointed out that even though this loss was tragic, he was able to spend so many years with his daughter when many do not and now she had given him a granddaughter. Two days later he was a plane to see the baby.
When I look around, it seems that we have become a society that is only able to focus on what didn’t go right instead of what did. We focus so much on the negatives that any positives can’t be seen. Maybe we have social media to blame for this.
We all have a right to an opinion these days. We are all experts on every subject and now have the avenues to express that, which is even what I’m doing now. But most of these comments are no longer respectful disagreements or a having a different opinion, rather having a go at someone for this difference. As someone who writes, blogs and posts quite often, some positive comments do come my way, but they are outnumbered by the negatives. Do these avenues teach us to look for the negative, having a flow on effect into other areas of our lives?
I sometimes struggle to be positive. I used to be able to do it better, but thanks to a busy life and a jam-packed mind, I’m struggling more. That is until I heard that story and those words…” Find the gift”. It’s amazing how just a few words can have an impact.
In every situation, no matter how terrible, how difficult or horrible, there is always something positive you can focus on. Even in death, you can celebrate the gift that was and time that you had with that person as some time is better than none. In struggle, the ability to grow and see life in a different way could be the thing that helps you. There is always a gift somewhere, it’s just a matter of opening our eyes and our minds to be able to find it. It is also a choice. You can continue to dwell on what isn’t going right, what happened or blame something for stopping you or you can ask yourself, where is the gift?
In the last week, I have started to change my thought process and I feel like it is just the start. It’s not just this statement that is encouraging me to do so, but also a fantastic positive business coach who is teaching me the importance of positive statements when working through my tasks and projects. When you speak positively, you start to think more positively and I’m starting to see that.
But in terms of gifts, it’s Christmas! Every time I have a moment about something, no matter how minor it is, I stop and tell myself, ”find the gift. It’s amazing when you start to shift your mind, how many gifts are sitting there unopened.
This might sound fluffy and even writing it I’m wondering if I’ve taken a bit of a trip down to the spiritual side, but as a woman who sometimes struggles, I like to share things that work when I find them. And that is my gift to you.